No shit...

My amusing moment for the day...

So, I just filled out some unimportant online form and had to do one of those Captcha verification things. Fairly common, but the word they choose to verify that I am, in fact, a human and not a computer? Non fecal. As in, no shit. Of all the words (and non-words) in the English language that they usually use for those things, I get "non fecal."

So goes my life...

Move over, Martha!

So, Martha Stewart I'm not, but I have my moments of craftiness and kitchen prowess, so I thought I'd be a little domestic and share a lovely crafting incident and an oh-so-yummy recipe today. Just a couple of gems to make up for the MONTHS that it's been since I last blogged!

Last weekend I was invited by the BoyFace's little sister's mother-in-law (who is, coincidentally, also his best friend's big sister...it's all a little confusing, I know) to a delightful little affair known as the Scrapbook Party. As nice and innocent as the hostess's intentions may be, these things always end up being about 15% fun and 147% stress for me. Of course, they also end up being about 2% actual scrapbooking and 968% sitting around talking about what I'm going to scrapbook.

I'm the world's most indecisive person, so trying to narrow down a total of about 15 pictures out of the thousands I've taken or been in over the past 25 years of my life can be a very daunting (and for me, apparently impossible) task. Knowing these things about myself, I decided this time I was going to carefully choose a handful of pictures and take only those pictures to work on at the party. "What a genius idea!" I was thinking to myself at the time. "Life will be so much more simple, so few decisions to make!" Yeah, I was WAY wrong.

I took my few pictures, loaded up my giant tub of scrapbook junk and set off on my merry little way to Bonifay, very confident in the fact that I had nipped all the stress in the bud and was going to be very productive at the party. Wrong, wrong, wrong. I got to Tammy's house (which, BTW, is the most perfect depiction of Shabby Chic I have ever seen...it's seriously magazine material...but more on that in the future...) and, much to my dismay, she opened the most glorious of craft cabinets...and then announces that we're all more than welcome to use any of her millions of sheets of paper, thousands of pens and stamps, stickers, embellishments, fancy scissors, etc. Well, of course this opened an entirely new set of decisions...I've got the pictures, but what do I do with them? Does the one of the BoyFace in his niece's pink and white polka dot sunglasses need a cute and silly girly background, or does it need to be camouflage or something else uber-manly to counteract the already disturbingly girly picture? Do the pictures of my family at the FSU v. UA football game last year actually need to be scrapped on FSU related paper and such, or can it just be similar colors or can I really just do whatever the heck I want regardless of theme, color scheme or any other restrictions set by the scrapbook nazi? It was all just too much...so I decided to snack and gossip instead. There was actual scrapbooking going on and I managed to produce one (super cute!) page by the end of the night, but considering that I was there for about 6 hours, I suppose that's really not saying much! For those of you on the edge of your seats wondering what I scrapped, it was the picture of BoyFace in the girly glasses...and, (finally, after hours of agonizing decision making), I went with the super girly background...purple with lots of polka dots to match the glasses. Hey, he brought it on himself by letting me take a picture of him wearing them! Don't pity the BoyFace.

And now, it's recipe time! I've been feeling pretty Betty Crocker-ish lately and really like to do things like sit on the couch and read - yes, I said read - cookbooks. In so doing, I've happened across tons of new, yummy recipes. So, when I was invited to the SP (Scrapbook Party, for those of you not down with the lingo) I thought it would be the perfect time to try one out! It turned out so well that I ended up having to write it down over and over that night to pass out to all the girls at the SP (which also helped me waste time so I wouldn't have to decide what to scrap!). The recipe sounds a little strange at first, just a hodge podge of ingredients, but it's super easy and surprisingly delicious! So, without further delay, I proudly present to you POPCORN GORP!

8 c. (about 1 bag) popped natural flavor popcorn
3 c. coarsely crushed corn chips (like Frito's)
2 c. Kix cereal
1 lb. white chocolate or white almond bark
2 c. m&m's or Reese's Pieces

Combine first 3 ingredients in a large bowl.

Microwave white chocolate on high, 1 to 3 minutes, stirring every 30 seconds until melted. Drizzle chocolate over popcorn mixture, tossing to coat. Stir in candy. Spread on a wax paper lined cookie sheet or jelly roll pan. Chill 30 minutes. Break into pieces and store in an airtight container. Yield: 16 cups

The original recipe calls for m&m's, but they're not my favorite and I wanted fall/Halloween colors, so I opted for the Reese's Pieces. I doubt I'll ever do it with the m&m's now...it was SO good with the Reese's!

One more thing...
Since I've gotten so into the cooking/recipe stuff lately, I was thinking it would be fun to do some sort of recipe swap. Anyone else interested??

Hmm, that's alot of blogging I just did. I think I need some GORP to refuel.

HGTV, shmHGTV

Dear HGTV,

Thanks.  My productivity level is now zero.  I don't have a home, I don't have a garden, I'm most certainly not your target audience.  In spite of this, I find myself intrigued.  House Hunters?  Brilliant.  Design Star?  Genius.  Hidden Potential?  Flawless.  

Not only have you drained my productivity, you have also managed to successfully highlight the serious downfalls of my homeownership.  What?  What's that you say?  My situation cannot be called "homeownership" because I do not, in fact, own a home?  Well, thank you again.  You have sufficiently proved my point.  I do not own a home, I do not have $200,000 with which to buy a home.  I do not have a home to remodel, to renovate, to redecorate or to "re-" do anything else to.  Yay for me.  

HGTV, I hate you.  Nay, I loathe you.  Keep up the excellent work. 

All my love,

Lauren

My Favorite Baby

Guthrie part II...

I'll add some more, better pics shortly, but for now I can at least share stats!  

Geez, this kid...

10 lbs. 5.8 oz.  

20 inches

born 5-24-2o08 at 12:21 pm

UAB Hospital, Birmingham, AL

He's way cuter in person and has ALREADY been picking his head up and sucking his thumb!  

Guthrie Franklin Holmes

My favorite baby in the whole world!  Don't worry...he'll get cuter when he's more than 55 minutes old!  

Welcome to the world, Baby Holmes!

So, at this very moment I'm sitting in the waiting room of the maternity ward at UAB.  I'm getting a nephew any minute!  It's surprisingly boring to be such an exciting thing, but once the waiting's over the fun will begin!  As of Monday morning, Guthrie Franklin Holmes weighed 10 lbs. 2 oz....and was still in utero.  Yikes.  Fortunately for the mother (my sister-in-law Heather), the doctor scheduled a cesarean.  I couldn't imagine having to deliver such a big baby!  The other big news of the day is that it's Chris and Heather's 1st anniversary.  I can't think of a better anniversary gift than a new baby!  They had they're "last supper" last night and got up first thing this morning to head to the hospital.  Heather is pretty miserable.  Well, maybe not so much anymore, she's got drugs!  She's recently been quoted as saying "I just want my vagina back!"  I'm beginning to think someone else's pregnancy and delivery are REALLY good methods of birth control!  For those who may be curious (and because it's unusual)  "Guthrie" is from the folk singer Woody Guthrie...think "This Land Is Your Land"...Chris and Heather are fans of his.  Franklin is a family name on our dad's side...his middle name is Franklin, our grandfather was Frank.  Definitely unique, but if you know Chris and Heather, it's fitting.  Anyway, this is a sort of stream-of-consciousness post I suppose, but there's very little to do in this waiting...but wait.  So, here we sit, waiting.  He'll be worth it.  Any interested parties may find Chris and Heather's take on this whole event on their blog "Sitting on the Egg."  Here's the link: 

 http://southernfriedfilms.com/baby

It's full of ultrasounds, Chris's rather amusing take on fatherhood, Heather's belly, etc.  Probably not as much fun for all of you as it is for me, but it's entertaining!